18 things that happen when you live with other people…

Ah, communal living; the land of passive aggressive fridge notes, passive aggressive group chats, enforced borderline alcoholism and more drama than in an episode of Ex On The Beach – but you wouldn’t have it any other way. (Or at least, can’t afford to)

Here are 18 things that happen when you live with other people…

1) Someone will always callously jump in the shower just as you muster the strength to get up and pee

1
Continue reading

Advertisements

15 things that happen in your mid-20’s

The midlife crisis is a well-known phenomenon; you may even know somebody that’s fallen prey to it and has suddenly developed a large collection of Hawaiian shirts, leather trousers or rock’n’roll compilation CD’s. What’s not so widely publicised though, is its preliminary attack; a smaller, but equally life changing milestone on the landscape of adulthood, the quarter life crisis.

As soon as you hit your mid-20s, you change. You start to realise that your parents were annoyingly right about a lot of things, your choice of TV becomes extremely questionable, and you spend the majority of your days wondering what you’re doing with your life.

Here are 15 other things that happen in your mid-20s:

  1. You need eight hours of sleep to be able to function, even then you’re still tired.

  2. You have a bed time now; 10.30, 11.15 latest. Anything after this spells doom for the morning, and a high risk of violence on the tube.

    img_1033
    Continue reading

I let my best friend take control of my Tinder and this is what happened…

12799442_10208960036624951_7125206186174853243_n-1

Georgie and I have been best friends for over five years, during which we have shed tears over a number of abominable relationships, and have laughed in disbelief at some shocking dating disasters. Let’s just say, our milkshake brings all the twats to the yard.

Some say your friends know you better than you know yourself; they will offer words of encourage when they spot fetch happening, and they will be the ones to warn you against falling into a fuckboy’s ‘mirror pic’ lined web. We decided to test this theory.

For two weeks, we took over each other’s Tinder accounts, taking charge of biographies, pictures and dating arrangements, to see if we could help each other meet our matches.
Continue reading

10 ways to spot a fuckboy in his natural habitat

Spotting a fuckboy in his natural habitat can be difficult. FB’s as we’re going to call them, have learnt to evolve and often manage to disguise themselves as mates, or eligible partners.

Sooner or later though, unless you’re otherwise involved with an unusually advanced FB, an intelligent one, their web of fuckboydom will begin to unravel, one navy roll neck at a time.

Whether they’re a boat-shoe wearing ‘you’ll be hearing from my father’ fuckboy, a fitness #gains fuckboy, or the more common ‘cheeky Nando’s’ fuckboy; here are our top tips on how to spot one out in the wild.

  1. He tells you what you want to hear

This is a must in the practice of fuckboydom; if he’s going to have you at his disposal, he needs to convincingly fabricate a bond. To do this, he will most likely go down the “this is so easy / we have so much in common / I’ve never felt like this before” route.

Fuckboy
Continue reading

Why Valentines Day is the absolute worst

Valentines-Day-header-640x462

To some, Valentines Day is an occasional landmark; a prime opportunity to show love for another via the medium of tacky cards, blow up hearts and some kind of overpriced confectionary. For others, Valentines Day is a bit like having a Brazilian wax: painful, awkward and questionable as to whether it’s actually necessary.

This Valentines Day, women everywhere will be getting ready to dust off the lacy red or black lingerie, whilst their dates fight to book a table at a bizarre choice of restaurant, serving ten of the smallest courses you’ve ever seen.

If I haven’t lost you already, here are 10 reasons why I find Valentines Day to be the absolute worst…
Continue reading

Aspen Matis: ‘ My rape was not the end of everything; it was the beginning of something bigger.’

aspen-matis-640x360

On her second night at Colorado College, Aspen Matis was sexually assaulted by a fellow student. What she did next, many may find unfathomable: she asked her attacker to stay the night.

Accused of fabricating the assault by both the college and her attacker, Matis dropped out and embarked on a cleansing 2,650-mile trek from Mexico to Canada, along the Pacific Crest Trail. Alone and just 19-years-old; Matis survived extreme weather, dehydration, starvation, crippling illness, all manner of dangerous animals, and abduction on the walk.

Six years later; 25-year-old Aspen Matis is a celebrated anti-rape campaigner, New York Times contributor and best-selling author, with her compelling and brutally honest memoir: Girl in the Woods.

Continue reading

10 things that all women know to be true #GirlProbs

Holding up our publicly acceptable façade is not easy, there are many parts to our daily routine and contrary to popular belief, we did not ‘wake up like this.’

Not only are we at risk of impalement from bra underwires, we also  subject ourselves to tweezing, plucking, threading and waxing; something that can only be described as a form of self torture, that we occasionally like to pay for.

Below, are some other mild irritations of being the produce of an XX chromosome…

1. Hair sticking to your lipstick

1

Unless you regularly rock the ‘Croydon facelift and bun’ combination, you have probably been subjected to wind induced dignity loss at least once in your life.

Not only are things like blindness and mass hair consumption a possibility when it’s thrashing across your face; it’s also extremely annoying when it continually sticks to your carefully applied lipstick, in preparation of bumping into fit Dan from next door. It’s a cruel world when you’re forsaken by something, that you spend so much time and money on.

Continue reading

Top 10 things that all men should know about women…

We are educated on the difference between men and women from an early age. John Gray taught us that ‘women are from Venus, men are from Mars’ – a fact later backed up by Bananarama and that revolutionary Geri Halliwell single, Bag It Up.

But just in case lyrics, such as, “I like midnight, it’s when I’m in the mood, he likes the morning ‘cos that’s when he’s rude” haven’t cleared it all up for you; I’ve put together a list of the top 10 things that all men should know about women.

  1. MI6 has nothing on our investigative capabilities

1

If your girl ever asks, “who is she?” – you’re better off not lying, because she already knows who she is, where she lives, where she works, how many cats she has, her mothers maiden name and her national insurance number.

Continue reading

The London clean up – who is it for?

Dsc_7348

Change is all too inevitable; we learn to evolve, we adapt and we move on, but some changes, hurt more than others.

Slowly but surely, London is losing the gritty culture it’s renowned for, in exchange for a clinical and respectable facade. Legendary music venues, pubs, theatres and cabaret clubs are regularly being replaced by generic coffee shops, overpriced ‘no bookings’ restaurants and ever bigger train stations.

We are losing our identity to appease commuters, large businesses and multi-million pound developers, who ultimately have the city on puppet strings. London is being sanitised within an inch of its life, it’s not for the benefit of its residents, and tourists do not want to travel to see a new train station or a fast food restaurant – so who is benefiting here?

Continue reading

Dapper Laughs and the quest for bants

Screen shot 2014-11-10 at 15.52.03

In a modern day rebellion, much like Miley Cyrus shaking off her Disney Club credentials by dry-humping Robin Thicke, dressed in Masterplast – it seems we have waved goodbye to the gentleman in exchange for a misogynous, overly tanned, Lynx Africa wearing counterpart, otherwise known as the ‘lad.’

One fine example of this phenomenon is Dapper Laughs. Neither Dapper or able to stimulate any form of reaction that could otherwise be described as a ‘laugh’ from anyone with half a brain-cell, this so-called comedian makes a living out of being quasi racist, homophobic and telling all woman they’re “proper moist.”

Continue reading